How to tell tweens that chores are important

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There may be no one who knows how bad chores are like a mother. Moms are always cleaning up messes, doing laundry and making sure the house is in order. It’s not always fun, in fact, it’s rarely fun, but moms know it has to be done and a house has to be maintained. However, one day she will come to a point where she realizes that her children can now help her with household chores. That they can help clean up and do chores and that’s usually around the time they’re tweens.

While kids of all ages can and should be encouraged to do chores, tweens are entering a whole new phase. They are more independent and can handle many more tasks than their younger siblings. The only problem is that there is usually some recoil.

Tweens don’t want to do chores, and we can understand that, but it’s important. Mom needs to find a way to explain why chores are so important, to encourage her tween to want to get up and participate. This is something that will benefit the whole family.

RELATED: A Simple Guide For Tweens To Wash Clothes For The First Time

A different point of view


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via Pexels/cottonbro

It can be difficult for mom to explain to her child the importance of household chores because she doesn’t know the answer. It’s just something she knows, so it can be hard to put it into words. According to Parent Education Center, if we look at chores through our child’s eyes, we can understand repression. Preteens often have poor judgment, which means they don’t know how much effort it takes to clean a house or that there’s actually work to be done. They are also naturally egocentric. They are at a stage of development where they only think about themselves, and that’s normal, but it can be difficult for them to want to help around the house.


In order to motivate them, you need to appeal to their sense of empathy and help them see how doing chores benefits the whole family and that there is something for them.

Thinking ahead


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Credit: Shutershock

If your tween is hesitant to help you because he doesn’t know how to take care of a home and a family, it might be time to teach him. It doesn’t have to be a lecture, and you certainly don’t want it to go that way, because your tween will probably stop listening. However, you can sit down with them and talk about all the chores you do, and it can help them understand how hard you work and why they should help you.

According to momentum of life, this is also the time to start talking about their future. Preteens usually can’t see too far ahead, and while they may not be ready to leave the nest, eventually they will. Helping you with household chores is the best way for them to learn important life skills that they will take with them into their future.

Make it fun and productive


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There are a million different ways to make chores fun, it just takes a little creativity. Mom can put on some fun music, yes – it should be music your tween likes, and how chores don’t have to be boring. This can be a great way to bond and if you couple this with the teaching that “many hands do light work” your tween can be motivated knowing that with everyone’s help it won’t really won’t take that long.

Chores can also be fun if there’s a reward at the end. Even though we want our kids to do nice things because they care, even adults like to reward themselves with a treat after hard work. How about some ice cream when everyone’s finished?

It’s all about them


Do my tweens think I'm a bad mom_ Signs you're killing it, mom
a group of teenage girls

As we mentioned earlier, tweens are in a place of self-obsession, so mom needs to use that to her advantage. According to small beans, chores will make them better people. They are going to be responsible and independent, and they will continue to do so for the rest of their lives. They will also be more confident because they are responsible for keeping their own room clean and having it the way they want.


Tweens will likely care gently about the things that mean a lot to them, so it’s all about finding what works for them and working with it. Look together for fun tricks that promise to make certain tasks easier. If you’re both having fun, chores don’t have to suck as much for anyone.

Sources: Parent Education Center, momentum of life, small beans


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